Sorry, you can’t just wish them away: What to do when people get in the way of work

 

Coworkers, can’t live with them, can’t live with them.  Whether it’s Mary with her constant talk about her dating woes, John who never seems to hear you say good morning and keeps on walking, or Anna who  downplays your ideas, but coincidentally “comes up” with a similar idea off the cuff in your next staff meeting.  There are plenty of times we all wish we could just do our work without people.  

While there is work out there that has minimal contact with others, there are many of us whose roles require regular interaction.  And if we don’t get it right, it can impact our ability to progress.  So where do you start?  

1. Identify your pain points

You already know full avoidance isn’t the answer, however, it is ok to minimize interactions when you feel they are not constructive.  To recognize when an interaction is veering into that lane, you have to know what pushes your buttons and how long it takes to reach your limit so that you can take action.

2. Learn how to segue

If done effectively, this can help maintain work relationships by shifting the discussion into something constructive for both of you.  Take for instance Mary.  Say you’re 20 minutes into nodding politely as she is describing her latest date in excruciating detail. While you probably want to yell out “stop it!”, that approach has a few drawbacks.  Maybe instead you could ask for her advice on a work project.  “Oh, Mary, I’ve been meaning to ask you about [insert project name here].  Can I tell you what I was thinking? I would love to get your thoughts.”  

3. Plan an escape route

Sometimes a polite change in topic just doesn’t cut it. For instance, with our friend, Anna, sharing your thoughts on a project, may end with another frustrating staff meeting in your future.  You may want to limit the shop talk with this coworker.  And then there’s John, your attempts at pleasantries haven’t paid off.  You could try a polite wave, “Hey, John” and keep on walking.  If he doesn’t speak that’s on him, but you still look cooperative to others who may see you in passing.  Or there’s always the “I’m running to a meeting, let’s catch up later!”

There’s no one size fits all.  The key is giving it some forethought.  With a little planning, you can gracefully navigate these situations and come out on top.